This has got to be one of the FUNNIEST freakin videos out there… Recently my father sent me a paper he did on stress management in the work force… I would however like to end off that paper with the following…
All the best to my father… hahaha what a laugh this guys has… must be in the yoga.
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps: “My friend is dead! What can I do?” The operator says: “Calm down, I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: “OK, now what?
Where once it was simple shoulder massagers and turkey basters that had to be adapted to nefarious purposes, nowadays anything you can think of (and probably a few dozen things you could never think of) are out there to give some lonely shut-in the pleasure they can’t get from molesting a damp slice of bread or a pumpkin. Things like these …
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If you recently saw our post below from earlier this week, you gotta catch up with the full version, and an audience tribute…
This little ditty was sent to us today. Now we are not in the habbit of making fun of anyone, and in this case, the lady has a FANTASTIC voice, and is SO CONFIDENT that she knows english, and man it is more fun watching the female judge try not to fall over… really, she is a talented singer, she needs to concentrate on language to perfect things… Good for her for going for it. Ken Lee - Bulgarian Idol (WITH ENGLISH TRANSLATION)
This is a classic SNL bit that I found for your entertainment. I have been in technical support, well project management my whole career and I have to say, they really hit this one well… I hope people don’t view me like Nick Burns hahaha. Your computer guy, Nick Burns brings it home with this old funny joke.
Little Johnny got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards.
Little Johnny asked why he wore his collar that way. The man, who was a priest, said, “I am a Father.”
Little Johnny replied, “My daddy doesn’t wear his collar like that.”
The priest looked up from his book and answered, “I am the Father of many.”
Little Johnny said, “My dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn’t wear his collar that way.”
The priest, getting impatient, said, “I am the Father of hundreds,” and went back to reading his book.
Little Johnny sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said: “Maybe you should wear your pants backwards instead of your collar.
Sent to us from Liana, and yes, thanks Liana, it did make us laugh…. really cute joke
A healthy young couple decided they wanted to get married would do so at a beautiful warm resort on the beach in the Caribean.
All was set up for the ceremony, the guests were in there chairs slowly sinking in the sand, the groom stood by the alter with a huge smile, and the minister stood patiently alongside awaiting the arrival of the bride to be. The evening was beautiful. The waves from the ocean lapped at the shore and the sun was performing a rich warm sunset.
Then she arrived and walked proudly down the beach holding her flowers and smiling from ear to ear. When she stood in front of the minister she put down the flowers and everyone saw she was topless.
The minister stopped and advised the young woman, “I can’t marry you like that, its not right.”
The young bride looked him in the eye and said, “yes you can, I have a divine right.”
The minister responded by saying; “yes you have a divine right, and you also have a divine left, but I can’t marry you dressed like that.”
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item fro m a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs.
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
‘That’s nice,’ she thinks, ‘but I want more.’
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
‘Wow,’ she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
‘Oh, mercy me!’ she exclaims, ‘I can hardly stand it!’
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store’s owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.